"We need to talk." April 8, 2014.
*DISCLAIMER*: This audio will hit you right in the feels, so fair warning to everyone who decides to listen.
Play at your own risk.
• Grades are more important than your morals,emotional & physical health
• How to hate people in general
• To want to quit life weekly
• How to text/eat in class without getting caught
• Why I will never amount to anything
mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell
i just realized that i have a roommate and its april fools im going to turn a bunch of things in the house upside down and hide dinosaurs everywhere goodnight
now we wait
she just walked in and didnt even fucking care. didnt bother to turn anything over. just sat on the floor. shes been eating that burrito for 15 minutes
"According to the FBI, there have been 129 confirmed white Christian terrorists in the last 20 years. That includes Timothy McVae, the uni-bomber, the Atlanta Olympics bomber and dozens of family planning centers and abortion clinics. Muslims? 19. Which would make white people the most likely demographic to commit a terrorist attack. So watch your mouth before you call me a terrorist or I’ll knock your fucking teeth out.”
one night my roommate brought home a girl from a party he was at and I was up when they came home eating fruit roll ups and I offered the girl some and she ended up sleeping in my bed with me and now i’m known in my whole residence as the fruit roll up cock block
this is funnier now that everyone knows I’m gay omg
you know that mood you get in sometimes where you just fucking are in love with drinking water
why are college and university textbooks so expensive, i could have bought four dogs instead of the textbooks i bought for this semester. and thats just sad. because now i’m broke, i have readings to do, and i don’t have four dogs.
Every so often one of these comes across my dash and I just start laughing hysterically because this meme is simultaneously one of the most pointless yet entertaining things ever.
oh my god
Featured on a 1000Notes.com blog
wouldnt it be fucking scary if you had a clock that counted down until the moment you die. like what if it could be altered too like one day it says 70 years left but then you do something and it says 10 minutes left and youre like what the fuck i fucked up i fucked up i fucked up
what if you got on a plane and then as soon as it took off everybodys clock changed to 20 minutes
Okay, so, the chickens are doing some kind of festival dance around the baby. I think they’re going to sacrifice it to the chicken lord.